Today, tomorrow and all the days after that, God is with youBeth Grant
Hi, I’m Beth and this is my story…
I was 8 years old when my mums best friend had introduced my sister and I to church. Going into the church building and being completely overwhelmed by the amount of people that were around, I didn’t know anyone and from a young age I knew I had struggled to be apart of groups of people I was totally unfamiliar with. My sister never struggled with throwing herself into different activities that had revolved around the word of God and the Bible. Everything seemed to come naturally with her.
My life was easy growing up. My parents had eventually, a year after my sister and I had been going to church, had started to get more involved and had then committed themselves to church.
As life went on I found myself falling away from the church and not really being interested in what it had to offer, some could say it was the teenage angst that had made that happen but I had actually found myself falling into a huge pit of depression and anxiety. I would find it extremely hard to leave my room, get up for school and even just taking the time to shower. I had doctors appointments after doctors appointments to try and help me get through the depression and help me take control of what was happening in my life, yet nothing seemed to be working and I had suicidal feelings almost all the time. I was self harming frequently, I found things I used to enjoy a drag to participate in, I stopped eating and within about six month of being diagnosed with depression and anxiety disorder I was also diagnosed with anorexia.
Nothing could change the way I thought about life and how everything was pointless and we were all here to die, with no intent of making a difference to anyone or how they could possibly see the world. My life was a mess and it broke everyone around me. My mum begged me to start eating again, my dad cried with desperation because of how scared he was, with the fear that I was going to die as I had no intention on changing things as my attitude always came with ‘who would even care if i died? my life has no worth, everyone would eventually get over it.’
My life had reached rock bottom and I remember having about 4/5 people from the church team come and pray over me and they all expressed how much God loved me and how much I was valued within the church. They told me how much I can use my story to help and change the lives of many while I was in recovery from all that had happened. I began slowly asking my dad questions again and becoming more intrigued within the church, seeking more of a personal connection. I wanted to be able to seek God and ask for guidance and slowly give it all to Him again. I realised that God cares and that I am made within His image! I was exactly where He wanted me. It seemed unfair and I was lost within my way but God had everything in control and in His plan.
He showed me that I’m not alone and that I have Him beside me. Always.
I believe that everything in my life happens for a reason, and that the struggles I go through are not there to make me weak, because I know God will never give me anything that I cannot handle.
‘Your worlds not falling apart, it’s falling into place and where God wants you.’
We hope that you loved reading Beth’s story and seeing how God has been working through her and in her life. Remember that your story has value and has so much power. Whatever your story is, tell it with confidence, knowing that the Creator of the universe designed it uniquely for you. Your story is so very important and so very special. It makes you who you are and has the power to change lives. Be proud of your journey and proud of your story.